The world is made up of two kinds of people – the optimistic kind and the what-if kind.
I fall into the second category. I have been married for more than 15 years now. I have two kids; a thirteen- and an eight-year-old. We all love to travel and do that religiously several times a year. From infants to toddlers, I have hauled them on strollers and on my shoulders. Yet, after all the years of travel experience, the stress to pack for the kids still makes me uncomfortable.
Although, I am getting better at it over the years and each time I emerge as more packing savvy than I was before my previous trip. But it has taken me years to get here. The anxiety creeps in months before the trip, most of the time it begins from the point when I finish booking a ticket. Be it beaches or mountains, a leisure trip or a trek, I have many thoughts that poison my travel reverie. For instance, the thought that my children are short of clothes would often pop up. Typically, I place an online order for an entire new wardrobe for them without even considering what they already have.
And then I picture them famished and hungry while I am on my quest for anything green on the menu in an unknown land (we are all vegetarians).To avoid that situation I decide to carry my own food. My forthcoming weeks are spent watching Manjula’s Kitchen on YouTube to learn to cook all kinds of long-lasting food items. As a precautionary measure, I also add cereal, cookies, chips, MTR ready-to-eat mixes and even milk! Yes, I used to carry milk tetra packs until a couple of years back, even though my kids were old enough to eat anything available.
I also bring the damn medicine cabinet. If we drive, I have to pack for the road trip. If we fly, I have to pack for the plane ride. I even account for other possible scenarios such as spills and pee mishaps, rainy weather, torn shoes, lost passports – the list goes on! I start to arrange the contents of my suitcases each day, seven days before the date of departure. It is safe to say that the number of the suitcases becomes directly proportional to my imaginary problems.
Two days before the day of reckoning, there is another problem to deal with – the dwindling weight limits of the economy class of a flight. I have to reduce the things in half. And does that half fit in the trunk of my rental car? No, unless the faces of my poor little children are pressed against the window of the car to make room for everything else. The next day, I have to reduce the things again to another half, only to find out that most of the newly acquired clothes need to be returned at the earliest. Most of the food items are also tipping the scales. Needless to say, all that pre-packing goes in vain!
Meanwhile, my husband looks on smugly. He mockingly laughs at me. He sings to the swelled up stacks that I am taking out of the suitcase. I feel appalled, agitated and frustrated all at once. He knows that I like playing it safe. What does he know what it’s like to pack for kids?
Thankfully, he packs his own stuff. By now, it must be clear that he is an optimistic kind. He loves the thrill of deadlines. The dreams of falling short of clothes, broken eyeglasses, wet shoes and sleeping hungry never haunt him. This is his packing flowchart – leave everything to the last minute. Book a cab for the airport. Take the suitcase out. Lay the entire cupboard out on the bed. Pack two pairs of clothes less than the number of days of travel. Shove everything back in the cupboard and be off! That’s neat! He never worries about anything. He doesn’t have time to do so.
The moment of epiphany
After dozens of family trips, with so much planning and sorting, I am starting to wonder if my husband's method is better than the two?
I retrospected all my past travels – did I end up using everything I packed? No, not even remotely. Did I forget something still? I always do. Just like he does. If the outcome is similar for both of us I really don’t need to invest a month of planning for a week-long trip.
With all the packing thoughts off my mind, I can now plan my trip in detail by making a day-wise timetable on an excel sheet. It gives me clarity on the entire trip and how each day will progress. It helps me to reason with any irrational thoughts that never really occur. And when the packing anxiety starts creeping up, here are my tips, learned the hard way and borne out of the experience.
1- Stop worrying. Trust me, you will be fine. What you forgot can be bought except for a few admittedly vital items such as prescription medications and your passport. After all, haven't people survived on less?
2- Create multiple lists. One for the things that can be packed beforehand and the second for last-minute essentials. The more detailed the list is the less anxious you will be. Make it on your phone so that you can add whatever comes to mind immediately.
3- Before you start shopping, consider the wardrobe of you and your kids in a different context and surroundings. If at all you end up buying something for the trip, make sure it has usability after the trip.
4- Never pack for more than a week. Even if your actual days are more. Laundry services are easy to find and are more convenient than dragging the convoy of suitcases throughout your trip.
5- Mix and match. Pack items that you can create different combinations with such as denim and solid t-shirts.
6- Packing cubes are great to show precisely what you are packing and how much space it must occupy.
7- Being comfy always trumps being uber chic. An impossible to get in and out of jumpsuit can stay back. Swap your matching evening satchels with a big handbag.
8- Carry versatile and comfortable footwear. Sneakers are great for both you and the kids, for they can do double duty! Crocs should be the only other pair of footwear if you do need to carry one.
8- Invest in lightweight easy-to-handle luggage. They also give you the leverage of a few extra pounds.
10- Research on the destination. Google a convenience store and food options for yourself in each destination. More often than not, you would prefer to try local cuisine, which is fresh, as opposed to pre-cooked home food. There are options for you on the menu most of the time, no matter what you eat. I have had the tastiest vegetarian burger in the smallest Icelandic town which had only a single restaurant.
11- Try and rent Airbnbs or homestays. That way, food and laundry are always taken care of.
12- As for the important travel documents, store them on your phone. To be on the safer side, email it to yourself and WhatsApp it to everyone traveling with you who has access to a phone.
13- Check the weather forecast for your trip. If you see nothing but sunshine, leave the umbrella at home. You can always buy one if you get caught in an unexpected shower at your destination.
Travel is not only something that I love, but it is also an act of enormous privilege. A time where I can bond with my family. Being calm and keeping my sanity in place helps me to prepare for it and anticipate it as a fun activity. With growing age and experience I have learned to accept that things would always be forgotten, mishaps can always occur. I cannot predict the potential scenarios with accuracy. But I won’t let these trivial things ruin the whole process for me. It is a promise I have now made to myself.
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